Will i destroy''him''?

today,i stayed at home.....i felt my so called''devil form''is gone,i seriously am blank now,what happened?....i felt lost....i hate this blank feeling,it suxs.....but was told it is my mindset....etc....i actually needed to go Ray house for something,then i no nid go coz of delays....etc....Then i was asked for $$$ around 60 to 70 for some important use......Man,that seriously is alot,then unluckily just nice,i fell out with my father quite SERIOUS......till now,we didn't talk....he plugged off the com cord...... Why cant they understand me???i am trying to respect u then u give me all this shit that i dun even deserve....now i can't even ask for the cash i needed.....i am so......*speechless*...i seriously didn't like this at all...I dunno what is happening to me.....$$$,i am sorry....i noe''u''fork out a lot liao....but i seriously try to get the $$$ for u.....I am broke,i dun really noe what i am blogging here.....I SERIOUSLY BROKE,MENTALLY UNSTABLE,EMOTIONAL STUFFS WITH MY FATHER.....Oh,mighty god,i nid ur help.....I will open my heart for u,will u help me?Nevertheless,i have an important decision to make,should i accept and become a christain?or i should remain as who i am.....


Signing off~~~~
..................Haiz...........